Oodles of vegetables in their chocolate form

Oh my word, you would think our office was made of chocolate. Chocolate here, chocolate there, and some more upstairs. It's everywhere - it's like it's the mostest favourite and popular thing to give colleagues or business acquaintences for Christmas.

My boss called me today. "Do you want a box of chocolates?"

"Why?"

"Patti was given another box and just about exploded - she can't handle anymore and won't take it."

"Why - is it a lot?"

"Yeah, it's pretty big. The box is big, anyways - it's actually not too much chocolate inside."

"Okay."

So I went and got it. This was the most serious chocolate box I've ever seen. It was solid. Like a suitcase. It weighed more than the 4 bags of chocolate-covered goodies inside.

So I tucked it under one arm. And I put the bag of more chocolate and coffee that my boss had given me in my backpack. And I trudged my way to the train station. And I set the box down. And along came one of my coworkers (let's call him Reginald). I try to give it to him.

"No thanks," says he.

We get on the train. I try to give it to him again.

"No thanks," says he again.

Reginald departs the train. Dani stays on and gets off at the mall (y'see, I's still gots a few things to picks up, I has). Dani trundles her way through the mall - bulky jacket, pant suit, runners, bulging backpack, big honkin' red box with wide, gold ribbon around it. Let's not forget the big bow on top. I trodge my way into the first store.

"Welcome!" Three cheery girls working at the counter.

"Why thank you," says I.

"Oh, and you even brought us presents!"

"You want it?"

"What?"

"Here. There's chocolate floating around everywhere where I work."

To innumerable echoes of "What? Do you mean it? Are you serious? What?" (it went on for a while), I opened the box, showed them the chocolate, bought what I came for, and left.

"Merry Christmas!!" They all yelled at me as I left.

No more big honkin' red box of chocolates (that weighed probably more than my aunt's dog, I'm sure) tucked awkwardly under my arm.

Now I've only got the 10 pounds stuffed alongside the coffee (mm, won't my roommate be joyous!) in my backpack to demolish. Maybe I should invite the neighbours over...